Posted in ~Poetry A Berna Original~, ~~FREE Flow of UNscripted Thoughts~~

>>FORGIVENESS<<

..Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting, nor does it mean that you’ve given the message that what someone did was okay. It just means that you’ve let go of the anger or guilt towards someone, or towards yourself. But that can be easier said than done! IF forgiveness was easy, everyone would be doing it…

..This ’tis the season of love!, compassion, understanding, empathy..I can’t walk or stand as a Catholic Christian without also letting go of negative energy in my heart against those that have hurt me in the past..Forgiving IS not easy! It has meant moving beyond my own comfort zone, BUT, I sigh with relief that my heart is now pure of ANY hatred.. I AM FREE AT LONG LAST.

‘Forgiveness’ A Berna Original Poem

Mandela forgave his captors and set his soul free..
That knowledge certainly had an impact on me
Yet..
I didn’t have the courage to forgive on my own
For so long I’ve had fears that were unknown
But..
A living angel whispered in my ear
True trusted friend & confidant that I adore!
Boosted me UP & convinced me to face fear
Head ON..
I hadn’t realized I could hurt a person by feeling hate
Max of hypocrisy…
To hate=hurt someone who wished to bring harm my way
I am not proud to admit..
It had grown so easy to DO and feel
Try as I must to always keep it real
And..
To live life out loud
And so yesterday I made a vow
To me/myself/and I
I will not hold chains on anothers’ soul
That is not how I get down nor roll
What I fear more than any person on earths’ wrath
Is ruining my relationship with God; my path..
2
Eternal life
So I dumped the hate from my heart in an instant

With hardly advance notice..
Poof!
Erased . Gone. No twisted motives..Just freedom of spirit!
I can’t soar being bogged down with negative internal ‘ish
And soar..
Is what I was created/born 2 do…
To myself I’ll always be true
Who knew?
Saying, I forgive you would help me to grow stronger
I’ll not fear for my safety; not a day longer
I’m a protected & very loved! child of God~~
My soul , and my colorful spirit!, has been set free.

****FOOTNOTE = Because of the concerns/comments I’ve had from folks who knew of the seriousness of what I forgave(they’re shocked I could forgive) ..I feel inclined to leave a footnote & then I won’t deliver any explanations thereafter..I’ve been asked questions @How do you know the person is sincere? How do you know the ‘ish is truly over?…Truth IS I don’t know if the person is sincere..I’ve no crystal ball & I’ve not yet learned how to read minds..To forgive someone doesn’t mean the scar is gone..To forgive someone does NOT mean you trust them; because in this case I certainly do NOT.(I can never trust liars) To forgive someone doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be friends; because in this case we certainly will NOT be..It is not on the person who forgives to know 100% if the person seeking forgiveness is sincere or legitimate..But in my book this is now a closed book. It is OVER(& actually should’ve been from the onset..) The onus now lies with the person who seeks forgiveness to own up & let things GO. DISCLAIMER = I’m not advising anyone to forgive someone , until you’re ready. No one has the right to ask another to forgive someone..I didn’t mean to imply that in my poem..Forgiving someone is a personal matter. I think we can all learn from one another; thus my reason for sharing this subject matter with my poem****

“He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love.” Quote by Martin Luther King, Jr

Posted in **RELIGIOUS**

*Are U a “Believer”?

I had NO intention of blogging this topic. Quite honestly I had an adult “issue” I was going to write about. Its Saturday! night and well, well..nevermind thats another HOT topic for another time. For some reason I find I can’t “not” write this line of thought out..To bounce it off y’all and hopefully get feedback. Either way I’m feeling a need to write-it-out. Might not be able to sugar coat it; but then again thats not my writing style. Ready or not here I go…>>

DISCLAIMER: Sort of;  for I make NO apologies @ I am a Believer in God the Father, the Son, & the Holy Spirit. I don’t , however, claim to know all Bible Scriptures by heart..Not sure I ever will. But what I do strive to do daily! is live as I think a  Christian is supposed to live and B. Yet, I’m still learning how to even fully do that. So with that as the backdrop here are a few thoughts, ponderings(a Berna’ism) , recent relevant experiences I’d like to share..>>

First things first. A few questions I’ll attempt to answer in this write..Does being a Believer in God; give someone the “right” to claim those who don’t are condemned to hell ? Does being a Believer aka(also known as..) a Christian; require LIVING as a Christian or just professing it? Do folks who go to church get more “credit” or God brownie points; than folks who don’t? Does going to church make someone a Believer? Can a believer in God be someone who doesn’t yet “realize” they are a Believer? Yea,  I really have these type of thoughts from timetotime..my mind has a mind of its OWN I have no control over where my thoughts will wander..So I stopped even trying>>

I’ve been on both sides of the fence..Was once a wanna-B-Believer. Attended church yet! I didn’t have faith nor did I truly believe in something I couldn’t see..I wanted to believe SO badly; but truth be told I didn’t even know how to pray back then. When I listened to how my exhusband prayed so easily & out loud with me; I was in AWE. I kept wondering how that “feeeeeling” was felt..To pray to someone that one could NOT see, feel or touch. I rode on my Mom’s strong, unwavering FAITH for years..I hoped! God gave me credit , brownie points, because I wanted to Believe. Did that count? Wanting to believe; badly? I can say this with utmost honesty..I didn’t know HOW to pray back then but when I did pray? I prayed that I would wake UP a Believer in God! And then one day, finally, while I was wide awake one morning and actually reading a very, big Bible…searching and searching for something to help me! through what I was going “through” at the time..I had a spiritual awakening SO strong & so vivid..that it knocked my socks off! And I wasn’t wearing any I was barefoot…>>

Since then? I’ve been on an UPhill momentum to walk like, I think, a Believer is supposed to walk. Sometimes its a very, very shaky-balance-beam walk & other times its smooth and easy. In my heart of hearts I think that is how it IS for everyone..If not I don’t think we’d be human. But those are just my thoughts …I don’t profess to know anyone else’s experience; but my own. Even prior to my first spiritual awakening(I’ve had 2 more since then..) I was already at heart a kind, compassionate person. I’ve always tried to “see” the best in people; before I assume the worst . And believe it or not; the ratio of that working out to long-lasting friendships/relationships has been great! My  natural instinct about people, the vibes I feel from them, is pretty good. Plus I’ve found often times? If you expect the BEST from people; they’ll rise to the challenge. Now that I think about it God has placed ALOT of really good people in my life; always. Even before I realized that was the case…>>

In my walk..I’ve heard people judge other peoples’ religious practices..I’ve heard people judge MY religious beliefs. I am a fully practicing Catholic. Exclamation point. Period. I’ve heard people, PROfessed Christians/Believers condemn others to Hell who don’t profess to be Believers..I’ve heard people chastise others(behind their backs..) about not attending church often..I’ve seen Christians who look & act miserable..My beliefs? I don’t believe ANY of us has the right to condemn anyone to Hell. How do WE know that the nonverbally professed Believer isn’t truly a Believer; and just doesn’t realize it yet? So to condemn that person to Hell is that God like? Is that what Jesus would DO? I may not, matter of fact I don’t have all the answers..but I just don’t feel that is cool nor the right thing to do. Shouldn’t it just be moreso about living as a Believer and not trying to micromanage other folks souls? Isn’t the best way to teach by …example? IF I saw a bunch of miserable frowned UP faced folks on the advertisement of a so-called comedy..And I love a good comedy cause I love, love laughing..well that is one comedy I’d NOT go see! But then again I’m still learning..and the more I learn..the more I yearn to learn..>>

Lately? In the most unlikely places folks, strangers, walk UP to me & say things like “YOU must be a Believer!” (that honestly happened at my Gyn’s office lobby) or “You are a Believer aren’t you? Can I talk to you? And forgive me for asking first; but some people get offended IF they’re not a Believer”(that happened at the Library) I find myself having UNprompted-by-me-conversations about God, Jesus, believing..etc etc at all sorts of places lately. And its WOWing me..Its like WOW so this is what being a Believer IS like..Other Believers really CAN pick up on it..Reminds me of a song we sing in my choir@ They’ll know we are Christians…>>

What I’ve learned..Its the people who I felt , at first, annoyed me the MOST..that I learn from! And part of the lesson is ME learning; to get over my annoyance & to use tolerance..and next! thing I know they’re my friend. Thankfully this hasn’t happened often..Normally? I easily friend pretty much anyone I come into contact with. You’re not a stranger long in my world..I’ve got an in-your-face-this -is-me personality..Some say its larger than life(actually a friend of mine recently told me without heels on I was MUCH shorter than my personality..) Either like or love me; or not. Whichever way you choose or are drawn IN..I’ll talk you too pieces. Lol, lollll. Aren’t but a few people I’ve met(maybe 3 in my lifetime) that I’ve got NOT 1 word I wish to say. Nada..but thats rare for me. And I’m trying hard to work on that too. I say all of this to say this = IF we say we are Believers; should not we strive to live as such? Outwardly? Better yet…WE shouldn’t have to say we’re Believers IF we’re living as such. Right? Or least this is the way I see it..Would love to hear thoughts on this topic..Until I read/write y’all again stay UPlifted & blessed. 4ever sincere, Berna (the 1 & only)

FootNote: Yep, I accidentally left out a part last night..Sleep was calling my name & I heeded..But anyways question I glossed over my questions  involving  attending church.@  Does going to church grant folks a get-into-Heaven-pass? AND Does going to church make one a Believer? ONE of the main things I struggled with the most in my pre-Believer part of life was attending church on a regular basis. It was my belief that there is NOT a place to go , just one! place, to find/seek GOD. IF that was the case I wasn’t sure if I wanted to find Him…IF that was the case what IF I physically couldn’t make it to church that week? What IF inclement weather stopped me from getting to church? And who the heck KNEW what amount of times of going to church was going to grant this God seeking mission? Was going to church ONCE a week enough? Oh! I had alot of arguements against churching it on a regular basis..Alot. Yet, I felt better overall when I “did” attend Mass on a regular basis even back then..Even though, I didn’t feel fulfilled..something was missing. I was going THRU the motions but I wasn’t feeling a belief in the memorized scripture or rituals. I was going to church because I figured I was supposed to go ; with my sons in tow. Now? I feel attending church(Mass) is an opportunity to commune with my fellow brothers & sisters. An opportunity to PRAY as a group, to WORSHIP as a group ..together..as I feel is intended. I also believe in the power of prayer & that its multiplied when done in numbers. And when I sing in the choir? Oh my goodness , I can’t speak for anyone else, but when I sing praises to God? Its in a sense a prayer inofitself that I’m offering up to my Maker. My Creator. My Protector of my soul and my very BEing..Its such an intense feeling for me. Sacred. I’m in tune with Him and often times forget I’m in a room, a space, with many. And it is “those” times when I feel the Holy Spirit come down over me in such a way its just, well, overwhelming, and I just lose control of my emotions. And THAT is the best, euphoric, feeling I’ve experienced on this Earth. I sincerely wish I could bottle that feeling UP & spray it on myself the rare times these days when I’m in a FUNK. You know those times when you just can’t manage to shake OFF those yucky, funky, F’ed UP  vibes? Yep, I know I’ve digressed & badly..bottom line is I don’t feel going to church makes one a Believer. Nor does it grant a get-into-Heaven pass..I also believe there are people who Believe that just haven’t put a name on it/haven’t realized they Believe/but walk & live as Believers. I also believe there are self-professed Believers who do NOT act very Christian like; alot. Personally? I fail every day in some way to B a perfect Christian or Believer. I’ve come to the belief I don’t think there IS such a thing as a perfect one. Nada. Zilch. And IF I ever run across one ; I’m going to take a picture of them & post in right here on my blog. They don’t exist..

Posted in ***DPCHALLENGE, **RELIGIOUS**, *DP CHALLENGE>Post A Day*, =Self Discovery=, Motivational!, Positive Movement Topic, WOW, ^Encouraging Words, ^^Thought Provoking^^, ~To B Continued

~~Daily Prompt~UN FaithFUL *DP CHALLENGE*Post A Day@Just DOing IT

I saw this prompt on WordPress this morning N could hardly believe my eyes! A chance to write, solicited, about my journey of Faith. A journey which spans an entire lifetime, mine, N a myriad of phases. From wannaBbeliever/attending Mass all the while over the years, yet not feeeeeeeling IT/starting 2 grasp IT/seeking 2 fully believe/Believer in every bone of my body and HUNGRY to learn more N more. Going to take a few moments to gather my thoughts so that my keystrokes can relay what I’d like to share. ^2 B Continued Soon^

Where do I begin  a topic such as Faith? A topic that has become so very personal 2 me that I’m excited just being about 2 write about IT. Saying that, keystroking it rather, still amazes me because a mere 5 years ago I’d not have felt such excitement over the topic of Faith. I was IN a different time N space then. A different mindset. And yet, I’ve been LED to right where I am now. The here N now. Present in the moment N oh! so content , pleased, HAPPY, to B in this moment. Any1 who has known me for a decent length of time knows that is a miracle inofitself…

I can not promise this will B a post of brevity. But I can promise it will B sincere N hope it is received as such. Never do I profess to be an expert in anything..though I’m experienced in ALOT ..I possess a PHD in life. From extreme moments of joy 2 being down in valleys so deeeeeep I didn’t think I’d make it out..alive. Real talk. There once was a time I didn’t think I’d live to see 50 yrs of age. There once was a time I did NOT want to live to see the age of 50 yrs of age. There once was a time my own actions /feelings were indicative that I didn’t like myself very much. And  yet by my outward appearance people thought I loved ME. But on the inside I was lost…a part of my inner being was murdered when I was a teen. An action that even my own Daddy couldn’t *stop* from happening to ME..and yet here I stand on the brink of making IT to 50 yrs of age. I am in AWE of that and that is tough! to express to people. So I no longer try…I just AM . Trying to live UP to my GOD given purpose. Far from that goal yet I’m so very , very much closer than I ever have been in my life. And you know what? I just feeeeeeeeeeeeeel GOOD about 99% of the time! Real talk. Alive, vibrant, and leaping out of bed each day @O’dark thirty hours eager! to start each new day. I say all of this to attempt to express to ya’ll how very GOOD that my GOD is allll the time. I’d not have wasted these keystrokes to say such personal things if not trying to show you just how FAR my GOD has brought ME..through things I didn’t think I’d ever make it through. Once something I yearned to believe IN(because those I loved dearly@my parents believed so strongly…) and now? I believe so strongly that  at times the feeling of goodness feeeeeels so good I get overwhelmed. Ever felt something that good? So good it scared you? And yet even that scared feeling of butterflies about to burst out of your tummy felt good?!? That is how I feel most of the time now…I can’t properly describe it any other way.

After experiencing a very  unexpected spiritual awakening in a state I’d lived in &  loved! since 1989..I found MYself led, guided, to move cross country. 2 beginning anew. At 48 yrs of age…I was simply put, terrified to do that! Yet everything happening was urging me/gently pushing me towards making such a bold move. I was afraid to do it. I was afraid not to do it. Hope that makes as much sense to ya’ll as it still 2 this day makes 2 me. Shortly after relocating cross country I was fortunate enough to attend my very 1st(but certainly not my last..) National Black Catholic Conference in Indianapolis with my parents & new church friends. AND MY LIFE WAS FOREVER CHANGED. Over a period of  4 days I for the 1st time in my life felt I belonged NOT just to the religion I’d been a part of since birth..but I began to feel remarkably different. I began to see things differently. I began to say things differently. It happened so suddenly! I had begun to believe in GOD fully and almost overnight. Not forced nor reaching to believe as I had my entire 40 some odd years…Bam! I believed. My life, the years past of my life/events of my life/people who had entered my life/circumstances that happened in my life/…began to rewind in my mind. Over days N days..as IF someone was playing a movie of MY life. I couldn’t STOP it..seriously thought I was losing my dang mind. I couldn’t tell anyone what was happening. Not even my Mom. Sounded far too crazy to try to explain..or did IT?

My entire outlook on things changed..Instead of feeling sorry for MYself about things I’d left behind..Stead of lamenting about people /loved ones! I couldn’t see daily(that I missed as if it were the AIR I had to breathe..) I threw myself head 1st into becoming the type of person I so admired. I began to WORK on tweaking/changing every facet of myself that I did not care for. Tough job to do at almost 50 yrs of age…I didn’t consult anyone. But I began to PRAY for guidance. I simply had a chat with GOD N asked him to please let me seeeeee the me that everyone else loves! Let me begin to love…ME. Heal me from things that happened long ago that were NOT within my control. Allow me to learn to lose  the tight, oh so tight! control, I have held over my heart. Let me live life to the potential I know you’ve plotted out for me since before my conception. And then! I realized I was talking to GOD..and I fully believed he was hearing me. Just so happened the exact way  I just wrote it. I became a full believer without the least amount of effort. A process of things over a lifetime brought me..here. So I’ve decided that it must’ve ALL been a part of HIS plan. That had my life happened any other way I simply wouldn’t have gotten IT. Once I was so very blind; but now I see EVERYthing so clearly. I kid you not. N I’m as serious as I’ve ever been about anything.

Now? I’m like a sponge. I am on a personal pilgrimage..Still journeying to get closer to my GOD. So much I’ve yet to learn . I don’t confess to have Bible scriptures memorized. Nor do I profess to be a perfect Christian. I am NOT a perfect anything. I am just me..the one and only creation of what my God created me to B. I don’t even long to be perfect! I think that would make me boring as heck…What am I? I am perfectly imperfect.

I’ll leave ya’ll with this final thought. Fear not if you don’t yet believe 100%…just wanting to believe is a start! WE are ALL loved children of GOD..whether we believe or not. This is what I feel. This is what I’ve come to know. And if we just stop trying to follow our OWN will N let HIS will for us B and go with the flow when we are LED by him…life gets SO much easier! I stress and worry so much less than I used 2..that is yet another miracle! inofitself. Not saying I don’t still worry about things; but its FAR less than I used to. Progress…for Rome wasn’t built in a day. And it is ridiculous to think anything, including a person, especially one almost 50 lol! would change totally overnight…but I’m getting closer. I am WISER. I am STRONGER. I am SO much better than I used 2 B. Can’t ask for much more than that. And? If it can happen to me, and I can assure you my words R true, it can/WILL happen to anyone. You if you want it 2. All you have to do is ..BELIEVE. Stay UPlifted N blessed ya’ll. N remember 2 count each and every one of your blessings 2day N every day. 4ever sincere, Berna(the 1 N only)

Posted in Things That Make U Say Hmmmm@

+WOMANing UP+

                                                                      

Can ya’ll believe I got a special request! WOW ..I’m not one 2 try to disappoint so I figured I’d go for it..Plus might B  kind of fun to write out what my actual expectations are. For the people that requested this I believe(I didn’t even ask..) probably by this time are curious (because I talk sooo much smack about this topic!) @ what type of brother I’d call a “potential” (mentioned that briefly in a prior post) N for the record I doubt highly if I’ll have this much freee time when I’m no longer single.Although who knows because I “make” time (at Odark thirty times like now..) in my very, busy schedule to do what I love 2 do..Write. Only place I don’t yet write is church. (and I’ll probably figure out a way soon to do that 2) So stay tuned folks(and btw its AWESOME to get the feeedback from ya’ll online and my offline family/friends/coworkers that my blog is enjoyable to read . even my ex reads this..blew my hair back! that is my way of saying I am humbled…) later after church I’m going to list (yep I’ve kept mental notes..) what I desire in a lifemate. The must haves. The wont do withouts. The wont settle for lesses. The DEALbreakers..The things I’m willing 2 work with..My entire list. Buckle UP this is going to be good..I can hardly wait 2 see this list myself. 🙂

I’m finally back! Wasn’t sure I was going to make it back 2night but here we go…First things First..Disclaimer: IF this post appears to be all about ME..it is because it IS. At this point of my life, for the 1st! time in my life, I’ve had the unique opportunity for the past 15 months to just do ME. Sons raised N in college(in other states than where I reside), single, divorced-yet-very-good-friends-with-exhusband who also resides cross country, happily/gainfully employed by a government entity, HAPPY! , busy, busy, busy, and very content to do me while I wait on the ONE to discover me. Once he finds me  then my ” just doing me” time will end. Far from desperate and trying to use every moment of precious time to live life to the fullest. There is life sans a man…N its so very good to me. YET its my belief that the missing link that will amp things UP and make life even sweeter is when my I becomes a We. Now that this is out of the way lets move on 🙂

As stated in a prior post I believe there are 3 categories guys fall into. Ever heard that old adage@many fish in the sea? It is so very true yet in my hearts of  hearts I believe there IS truly only ONE out there that God created just to love me N only me..I believe he’s looking for me! And I’m standing over here, at 5’4, waving my hand in the air so he can see me in the crowd. Here I stand and am I ever SO ready for you to walk into my life…yet staying busy in the interim and BEing patient. Or if truth be told I’m trying very hard to B..So anywayz as I was saying guys fall into 3 categories when meeting new folks. 1. Potential. defined simply as a potential lifemate..2. Just friends..right out the gate I can sense this..3. Toss them back into the pond & quickly! dont have an interest to even be friends because their qualities are severely lacking anything remotely near respectful..Now that ya’ll know the background on what I was referencing lets move on to my list. Ready? Get set. Lets go!

the Must haves=

  • must B a practicing Christian! My #1 N I won’t settle 4 less
  • must B a responsible  parent physically, emotionally N mentally(if a parent)
  • MUST have good communication skills! my #2 because I’m not a mind reader nor will I pretend 2 B.
  • is DONE fishing. simply said I’ve got NO love/patience 4 a player. exclamation point period.
  • emotionally available N if this needs 2 B explained then you aren’t..so therefore don’t qualify
  • kind . yep, this honestly matters 2 me
  • their “word” is like a handshake(N solid)  used 2 B backintheday..this truly matters 2 me also
  • HONEST..this is my #3 and goes hand in hand with their “word” being solid
  • Confident! I truly dig Alpha brothers so this comes naturally…
  • LOYAL..this is a close runner up to  my #2..another exclamation point period.
  • RESPECTS  his parents..this is a MUST..the adage@ if he respects his mother he’ll respect his woman  is true
  • TRUSTworthy ..this ranks somewhere between my #1 N #2
  • is cognizant of my feelings N mindful that I’m a naturally sensitive person
  • *HEALTH conscience* Life longevity is important 2 me. And feeeeeeling good from the inside out. While I don’t require someone that is a body builder I do desire someone who cares about their appearance including their health N what shape they’re in physically. Maintaining oneself physically/mentally/spiritually/emotionally  is something I feel is important

the things I am willing 2 work with=

  • I pray he has an appreciation 4 music N can dance! however I’m willing 2 work with it if he doesn’t
  • practices chilvary..while I do love this it is something I can take or leave..long as he is goooood 2 me
  • can appreciate a woman who can amuse herself from time2time(my writing!) and he can have “whatever”time(whatever HE chooses 2 do also)
  • attentive N fully engaged when interacting…this matters 2 me and shouldve been in the must-haves!

the DEALbreakers=

  • can’t handle monogamy..I can’t/won’t deal with cheating. highest form of disrespect to me N our “we”
  • asks 2 borrow  money the 1st 90 days of dating..OMG this is so much a dealbreaker!
  • LIES to me or is deceitful. this is a runner UP of my #1. I’m an open book and my man will B also
  • tries 2 change ME and won’t accept ME/love ME/cherish ME as I am. another close runner UP of my #1
  • has substance abuse issues=Illegal drugs isn’t my style. N though I gave UP social drinking quite some time ago (years ago now..) N I’ve no problem with folks drinking socially; matter of fact I don’t know many folks who don’t drink socially (tho I ride on a natural high N have just as much FUN now as when I was a social drinker..)BUT there is a major difference between a social drinker and abusing alcohol. N if I have 2 explain the difference than you probably don’t qualify..
  • MARRIED..this is my #1 in the dealbreaker category. Within the 1st few mins of meeting a woman 1st time a brother SHOULD rightfully make sure it IS clear if he’s married…Nowadayz I guess the IN thing is to not wear a wedding ring.Pfft! I won’t get deep on this topic(thats another topic for another time…) Just please do NOT attempt to “hit” on me while married; for I won’t be held responsible for what will come from my lips..N nope! with that kind of beginning we can NOT be friends either..
Posted in **RELIGIOUS**, ^Encouraging Words

~~Bruised *But*NOT*Broken~~

Good Monday Morn Church Family/Family/Mi Familia/Friends/Extended family of friends..I know I promised to not post anymore new topics till next week..and I won’t..after this one. On this beautiful morning IF you saw a Sista with a bright orange shirt and work out pants on brisk  fast walking pace  with bright purple earplugs in her ears N an Iphone clasped in her right hand singing loudly with joy as she walked down a very busy major street you should’ve waved N I’d have waved back! Anywayz this topic came to me as I was on my morning walk. AND I am going to go with the flow and let the vibe just flow..for I simply can not resist the itch to write N share N hopefully impact someone out there reading this that is presently..going thru a tough , dark time in their life journey…

It is probably evident by now as you read me..that I march to the beat of a different drummer. I readily admit and own that fact. Yet there was a time when I felt that being “different” was a very bad thing. I felt alone..like on an island. Tried to fit my “square ” Self..into social circles that were”round”. Afraid to speak my opinion for fear of being laughed at or worse totally IGnored. REjected. Now? I care less, honestly, what folks think about who I am, what I am, or where I have been. I am secure in the fact that its been revealed to me, over a lifetime, of not “seeing” signs/confirmations..what “my” God given purpose IS. And I am on a mission to fulfill it and reach the fullest level of it with every ounce of my being. I am SHE~ N ~ it  is personal…

For those that are reading this that are currently going thru a difficult , dark time N feel you are alone pleaseeee let me assure you ..you are never, ever alone! And I have been in your shoes. Let my past life experiences and my words be a testimony to convince you that you WILL get thru to the other side of how you feel at this very moment in time. Just hang ON. Try to be still N listen to the signs/confirmations that are before you. Sometimes the hardest things in life to “see”are the very things right before our eyes/ears. Know always you are a LOVED child of God N  if you call on him , pray!, he will bring you comfort to ride thru the wave of the “dark” times. For some of us this can take many, many moons..like me. But God sent me SO many angels in my life journey thus far that it became impossible for me NOT to see, recognize and give glory to where it was coming from…And when it hit me??? It hit me with such full force that it almost took my breath away. And now? I find myself testifying (which I NEVER thought I’d do!) N praying(OUT LOUD even which is a remarkable turn-about for me..) with words flowing from my lips that I didn’t even know I felt..until the words come out. Real talk.

As a passionate music lover(not much I do without listening to music..) these Joss Stone words from a song called Bruised but not Broken (I’ve lived thru these words also)  come to mind regarding this topic: “Gonna pick my heart UP/Take MY life back/Shake the hurt away/Pull mySELF 2gether, put the pieces back into place/I learned love’s so hard/Love left my SOUL scarred/I was shattered inside”…N after many years of living a life using my “own will” and not following God’s lead/will I finally, yep finally!, realize that as Jill Scott says it best how “Blessed” I am!

N last but not least these words come to mind as I try , with all my might, to further convince you that you’ll be alright ….These words from one of my fave artists on the planet@ Marvin Sapp. A song called , I never would’ve made IT:”I would have LOST my mind a long time ago/If it had not been for YOU/I AM STRONGER/I AM WISER/NOW I AM BETTER!/So much better/I made it thru MY storm & my test/Because YOU were there 2 carry me thru MY mess..

I say all of this to remind you to get to a point of “stillness & quiet” . Make a time every day to give yourself time to find that. God talks to us in quiet times. No boob tube on. No cell phone on. No music on. No incoming faxes. No other voices talking. One just has to be open N LISTEN. And usually that will mean doing things that one does NOT want to do! I speak this from my soul N my spirit. I have very much beeeeen there. Listening to HIM might mean at a ripe age moving back home after not having lived at home since one was 19 yrs of age; can you imagine that??? I stand here as a testament that doing things like that  can make one finally, yep finally!..bring one to feeling totally complete. Real talk…so never, ever give UP. Hang ON and you’ll get thru the troubled, dark and difficult times. Stay lifted, Stay encouraged N Stay blessed. Sincerely from the depths of my soul, Berna(the 1 N only)

Posted in **RELIGIOUS**, @Cultural, ^Encouraging Words, ^^Thought Provoking^^

******IRON sharpens IRON******

*I’ve got a lot stored UP that I’m ready to open for discussion so I hope ya’ll can keeeeep  up with me..I promise this is the last new topic from me for a bit N I’ll jump into each listed topic this week dropping my thoughts.  THIS  is one of my fave topics so sit back & get comfy.

There was a time I had 2 deal with a very, very difficult person on a regular basis. N a mentor advised me to remember that Iron sharpens Iron. What the heck was that supposed to mean?? Give me something that can help me deal with this horrid woman! Yep, it went right over my head..However, anyone who knows quite a bit from the Bible(which at the time I didn’t..) knows this phrase come from Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” At the time I didn’t realize how many adages/sayings we use come straight from the Bible! What my mentor was trying to gently tell me is to USE the experience of dealing with such a difficult boss to my advantage. And isn’t that what we should do in any situation we “feel” is bad?@ Try hard to find the good in it? Or the lesson we can learn from it? Hmmm. So anywayz “there is a mutual benefit in the rubbing of 2 iron blades together; the edges become sharper, making the knives more efficient in their task to cut N slice.

Lets take this in another direction since this is after all Sunday and many of us have attended Chuch 2day…”likewise the Word of God is a double edged sword(Hebrews 4:12) and it is with that we are to sharpen one another ~ in times of meeting, fellowship, or ANY other interaction. Wowww think about that @ any other interaction..Doesn’t this mean that as Christians this proverb indicates there is a neeeeed (or should be) for constant fellowship with one another? Could this be why we’re always so excited to see old friends after having been away? Could this be why we’re so excited to see one another at Church after not seeing each other for a week? Could this be the main point of the argument to support “why its important not just to BELIEVE in God but to gather at Church to worship together? ..I feeeel this is an important topic 2day because so many youth have either left the Church or were never properly introduced to Church by their parents…Believe it or not there was a time in my life when I felt I didn’t need to go to Mass. Yep, I confess. I was a pew parishioner from time2time when it was convenient for my schedule. And now??? Lawd, some weeks I’m trying to fast-forward to get to choir practice on Saturday N Sunday Mass! I feeeel like it is the fuel I need to gas UP for the upcoming week..its that important to me now. For the first time in my 49 yrs I’ve fallen in love with a church. My church.The PEOPLE that make up the church.  Where everyone is someone…If that turn-about can happen to me; it can certainly happen to anyone. I’m going to open this topic up for discussion..Hope ya’ll have a topic relevant story to share N tell. African roots has is its very foundation the story telling aspect from elders to the youth..Remember the youth are watching us always N I hope they’re reading this* Lets rap..