Today I forgot, again, that I’m almost 50 years old. Is there a certain way to ACT when one becomes 50? Are there certain things I’m not supposed to do anymore? If there is a specific new way to act or feel at 50 years old; I’m not there yet! Certainly NOT trying to look 50 yrs old, least not for another 15 yrs or so. I don’t know how to be anything other than…ME~~
…Today I was running(not a full force run; but I wasn’t walking nor was I jogging) while wearing 4 inch heels!/Sunday’s finest & cute!-special-4-Mothers Day- dress on/hair was hooked!..I was on church grounds headed to the Hall; the men of our church had cooked breakfast for all Mothers in honor of Mothers Day..Why was I running? I wanted a very good family friend(who recently had surgery) to not have to walk around the building to get into our church hall. Running while in a dress in 4 inch heels is NOT something I do often(unless a barking dog shows UP out of nowhere..I admit I’ve run like hell in those situations..in flipflops even!) but .. a. I didn’t want her having to stand on her feet too long b. I wanted that door open , instead of the back door, & it was locked c. I was starving!!!! I had not even a banana that morning and it was after 11 a.m. d. It was HOT outside & I move quickly in the heat to get OUT of it.. So anyways, before I “remembered that I was in a heels/all dressed UP/and that I’m just about 50 ” there I was running..Just got caught UP in the spontaneity of the moment..Later on; is when the *thoughts* began to creep into my mind…>
1st thought was * Dangggg I’m glad my Mom didn’t see me do that, lol lol! She’d have been horrified. My Mom is perfectly mannered at all times..I slip from time to time; I forget which fork to use when the table setting has more than TWO/I laugh sometimes when I shouldn’t cause when stuff is funny I can’t help it/I’ve been heard saying “oops” on the mic sitting in the choir in church(now THAT is embarrassing) & etc etc yada yada I just can’t recall all of the perfect rules of etiquette ! But I do think I’m serious so much of my life that at this phase; I am not trying really hard to stop my laughter or my spontaneity..>
Truth be told I’m LOLing a ton more at this point in my life than EVER before..Real talk for real..More than likely because for the first time in my adult life I’ve … a. Got no one but my own fanny to take care of; which btw was a major adjustment. I’ve been a parent as long as I’ve been an adult..if nothing else comes naturally to me it IS to nuture..I was like a fish out of water when my 1st son left years & years ago headed to college. And when the last one left to head to college couple years ago? For a minute I didn’t know how what to do next..I was like wtheck do I do now? Happens when one is always used to tending to others they love..now its time for Mama to tend to Mama. At long last… b. NO longer fear the boogie-man(seen him first hand and survived!) No longer fear being without, doing without, or being single..been there, done that, lived through it, and took tons of mental notes…lessons earned & learned c. Now with God holding the reins, my parents on each side of me emotionally, my sons loving me to the fullest, a host of loved ones & extended family of friends…whether I’m up or down I’m never alone. So with all of that who wouldn’t smile & laugh & laugh..koolaid smiles so wide my cheeks hurt! Bring it ON 50 cause I am ready..>
On most days I forget I’m knocking on 50…Until! I hear folks older than me say things like…Oh wow, 50 is THE age when your body starts falling apart little by little..*slapping forehead* and OMG…I’m trying with all my might to fight gravity and slap mother nature in the face for a little while longer..Its like a juggling act for sure; but so far everything is STILL where its supposed to be..Thank You God for blessing me with good genes; so good that I can still rock my jeans.
I think all things considered I’m going to keep forgetting I’m half a century old..Don’t want to lose my spunky lust for life that often times has me giggling like a little girl. I’ve earned those giggles! Don’t want to lose following through the urge to STOP and smell the flowers..daily. I appreciate all parts of nature…plants breed new life and re-growth. Don’t want to lose the pep in my step or the urge to sing out loud often times..Had to catch myself singing in the hall at work the other day(before someone heard me , lol ) But life really is that good; the song in my heart is singing loud all day loud..every once in a while its bound to slip out. And if I invited you to my 50th bday party in July? You’ll see just how a 50 yr old can still put the P in party…cause I’m going to dance & dance & dance & dance & dance..I don’t care if every bone & muscle in my body aches the next day..better not, lol! Going to party like its 1999!!!!!! Don’t remember that Prince song? Better ask somebody! And make sure they’re 50 & UP.. Older really is better and wiser>