Been holding off on this but I’ve got 2 release…Ready? Get set! Here I GO…
I’ve not spent many Valentine Days single. Matter of fact this is the longest time frame I’ve ever been single..the real trip is its been self-imposed/necessary for my self-growth/and I’ve purposely squeezed something to DO in almost every minute of each and every day. I’m busy trying to get closer to my GOD given life purpose! And must finally admit to myself and I guess to ya’ll too since I’ve taken on this daily blog venture..THIS IS NOT AS EASY AS I MAKE IT LOOK. I’m very much a novice at this…and OMG lately I think my hormones are multiplying. Wth? I thought nearing 50 my hormones were supposed to be decreasing???!??? How old do I have to be for that to happen? Lawd! Still getting a pimple a month at 50 can’t be normal..is it? Or maybe being 50 and celibate (is causing it) isn’t normal?!? Hmmmm well my norm has never been the norm for most..So anyways moving on with the topic at hand. Ya’ll really , really ready ?
I tried to resist feeling like this as Valentines drew near..I truly did! I even decorated at work in honor of Valentines Day, day of LOVE(my fave…), even though I was/am LoverLESS/ValentineLESS/boyfriendLESS/ManLESS..jeeeez thats alot of less. Yet, I don’t feel like a “less” in so many ways…at least 99%. But that ONE percent right now is beyond frustrating to me on days like this..when I stop for a minute and realize…OMG I’m not part of a love union. How did this happen? Although I know why and its been SO good for me to take a hiatus from love for a minute I still can’t help but ask that question. In my heart of hearts I know this was the way it was designed for me. But let me state again for the record THIS IS NOT AS EASY AS I MAKE IT LOOOOK
But WHY is this one day reserved for lovers anyway?!? And do men really dig Valentines as much as women?!? Flower shops/candy shops/lingerie shops & restaurants I’m sure dig Valentines even more than women…BUT don’t ya’ll want to be LOVED every day and NOT just shown love/appreciation on one day? Well I’ve got my hand raised high for that last option. For me its mandatory…
I can’t complain and I’m struggling not to; for this is something I said I wanted. A breather..although often times we know we need things/make things happen we know we need/and still it is not a cake walk. I just make it look like it IS; until nights like this. I feel like I’m coming quite UNglued..but this too shall pass. Right? It better Lol!
I’ve had great love in my life; and I know my last GREAT love is out there…As I’ve said before I know he’s searching for me. *waving hands in the air HERE I am!* I’ve grown to know that love involves patience..and I’m just practicing for that while I remain patient while waiting on it. And when my “the one” comes strolling into my life I’ll create free time for him. I hope he is as antsy about this Valentines approaching as I am…that means he’ll find me soon! Or least that is my interpretation.
So for all of ya’ll out there who are going to be linked UP for Valentines Day; my wish is you’ll stay IN love for years to come. For me? I don’t require candy/flowers/lingerie(though truth be told I love flowers & lingerie…) for V-Day; just give me love, love , loveeeeee, LOVE 365 days of the year.